In June I will be leaving Congregation B'nai Israel in Bridgeport, CT and beginning a new adventure with Congregation Emanu-El of the City of New York. This is my final bulletin article for B'nai Israel.
It was a very tense time in my life. The reason for the stress is not important now. We were waiting to hear some news, but there was nothing more to do to affect the outcome. So, I found a comedy special on Netflix, comedian and actor Patton Oswalt’s stand-up special “Annihilation.” I think it is still available.
He performed this show a little more than a year after the sudden death
of his wife, Michelle. And he talks about both that and the process of talking
to their then seven-year-old daughter about it. It is incredibly powerful,
moving and strangely very funny.
Oswalt recounted that Michelle was an author of True-Crime books. He said she hated the phrase “everything happens for a reason.” She would say, “It’s all chaos, it’s all random, and it’s horrifying. And if you want to try and reduce the horror, and reduce the chaos, be kind. That’s all you can do. It’s chaos. Be kind.”
It's all chaos. Be
kind.
Her words and his story
got us through that night. And I have shared it with many people.
You don’t need me to
tell you about the chaos. Listen to the news. Look at your collection of masks
and test kits. Ukraine. Terrorism. Cyber attacks. Politics and posturing from
all sides.
What can we do?
When I meet with new
teachers I share several principles that are sacred to me. The first is “Camp
is for the campers.” In other words, always focus on the experience of our
learners, rather than what is convenient for us. Another rule is “Dugma is Dogma.” Dugma Ishit is Hebrew for “personal example.” Always model the
behavior you want the learners to emulate. In every moment of my life with you
for the past 27 years, I have committed myself to live by the same rules I
shared with our teachers. So, what can we do?
Be kind.
Over the years, we have developed our shared vision for education at
B’nai Israel – for the children in Kehilah (formerly called Religious School)
as well as for learners of all ages. Together we have explored what we want our
congregation to learn about, and I have tried to teach how to apply Jewish
values and “all of this Jewish stuff” in every aspect of our lives, not just at
select moments. I have tried to live and model the sacred principles discussed
with the teachers, and the Jewish values we espouse in our new curriculum,
articulate as a congregation and hold dear as members of the Jewish people,
every day of my life.
By my count, this is my 296th and final article for the B’nai
Israel Temple Bulletin. And while I am moving to a new congregation in New York
City, we are not completely leaving the community. I look forward to seeing
many of you in days and years to come.
Take care of B’nai
Israel as it has cared for us all since 1859. And take care of one another.
It’s all chaos out
there. All we can do is be kind.
L'shalom,
Ira
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